Criticising Consistent Conformity in the Community

I was talking to Amy, the other day, about loyalty. She was telling me that there seemed to be one constant among her friends: The ones who were members of gangs were better friends than those who she met in college. I considered this… Why would this be true? There is a very simple answer.

First, let’s consider the schooled individual; we’ll call this teenager Mandy. Mandy is raised in a home with two siblings and parents who both work. It isn’t a dysfunctional family, but neither is it cohesive. She goes to school, where she is taught that she can accomplish anything if she puts her mind to it. When she is old enough to go to college, she is told how great an individual can become. Feminism is put in the spotlight, and she learns about her personal rights and how to put those to use. When she graduates, with her degree in hand, she gets a successful job. She might not be a lawyer, but she is confident in herself… and shallow. She has been raised to believe in the power of the individual, and because of this, she will not be able to form symbiotic relationships.

Now, let’s focus on the gang member; we’ll call him Joe. Joe is raised in a dysfunctional family. Neither of his parents have high school degrees, and they don’t have great jobs, but they make due. In high school, Joe finds that the only place he feels comfortable is with others like him - the poor kids with troubled families. Come to find out, these people he gets close to are actually part of a gang. He feels so welcome there, he does what he can to become initiated. After this, he decides he really doesn’t need the schooling he thought he did, so he drops out and spends all his time with his friends. He is confident in himself because he is part of a family. He believes in the power of an alliance, and he knows he is backed up by his brothers even if it means death or imprisonment.

This is not meant to downplay a good education or to glorify the life of a gang. It is meant to point out that strength is in numbers - not the individual. The individualism that is taught, today, is creating people that have their point of view, and they defend it to the teeth without much regard of others. They give the whole speech about ‘Freedom of opinion’ when they don’t even allow you to disagree with them. When grasping their way to the top of the totem pole, there is little thought are worry about who they might hurt to get there, because it is all about them. When you are in a gang, there is functionality and alliance because there is a hierarchy, and there is the ‘brothers’ connection. You’ve seen, I’m sure, how so many young adults will call each other ‘brother’ without being related in any way. This is because they are a cohesive family. With the individualist, there is no family; only self. In the gang life, no matter how difficult things are going, loyalty is key, and if you aren’t loyal to your gang family, you pay for it.

This ties into the problems of the dysfunctional church. The best churches are the ones where the people are family. If someone comes to visit, they feel welcomed. Familial churches will often adopt someone who comes to more than two services. This is why church hopping can be so damaging. You can’t hop through gangs; you would get shot. When churches begin the individual thinking, that is when they split. In the church that is a family, there may be disagreements, but those are taken care of, usually, without bloodshed.

Yes: It is good to have an education. No: You do not have to be a gang member to have good friends. Yes: Individualism causes more problems than it fixes. No: You don’t have to take my word for it. The crumbling society around us speaks for itself.